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Hi.
Friday, February 12, 2010


sometimes i wished i don't exist in this world. even if now i live for near nineteen years, i wished i'm dead. how long should i stay in this cruel world? sometimes i said enough is enough. but its never enough. it'll come back over and over again. i feel lonely as a daughter. sometimes i feel neglected by friends. then who should i turn to then. i screamed my lungs out to my pillow, my tears wet my smelly pillows. no one will ever hear. i'll cry myself to sleep, and i wake up in the middle of night, having nightmares. i wanted to screamed for mum, but i knew she won't bother. and when i woke in the morning, my eyes shagged. i could feel my heart beats heavier, and that i couldn't breathe properly. no one ever knew, this shit of life i'm through. cos once i stepped out from my room, put up a mask and fit in to the society. and i've been forgetting to eat lately. even if i'm hungry, it doesn't grumble. restless nights, lack of sleep is a routine now. and all i did was staring up the ceiling in the dark, see nothing but just dark ceilings. you think you know me so well, but you don't. sadly, you don't. no one will. tonight's gonna be another restless night, tossing and turning. bye world.